Divorce tends to be a very emotional process, and few concerns are more likely to trigger intense reactions than parent-child relationships. Parents who love their children naturally want as much time as possible with them.
Many parents assume that their rights have adequate protection after the courts approve custody orders. Typically, custody orders grant each parent a specific amount of overnight time with the children and a degree of legal authority over them.
Both parents should make reasonable efforts to uphold the custody order. While they may need to occasionally make adjustments due to unexpected disruptions to the family schedule, both parents should uphold the custody order as it stands. If one parent repeatedly interferes with the other’s time with the children, that could be a violation of the custody order that warrants appropriate action.
One parent doesn’t have unilateral control
In a shared custody scenario, neither parent gets to make major decisions about the children without the input of the other. With exceptions for minor decisions and emergencies during one adult’s parenting time, there is an expectation that both parents should communicate about major issues and look for ways to cooperate with one another.
A parent who repeatedly interferes with the other’s time with the children and cuts them out of major decisions may have violated the custody order. If one parent reduces or cancels the parenting time of the other adult in the family, they should offer an opportunity to schedule makeup parenting time for the time lost.
If one parent repeatedly eliminates the other’s time with the children, schedules appointments during the other parent’s time or otherwise tries to interfere with the current custody schedule, their actions could harm the connection the other parent has with the children. Particularly when combined with negative talk, the cancellation of parenting time can damage a parent-child connection.
How frustrated parents can respond
Those experiencing parenting time interference can assert themselves. They may need to document canceled sessions. In many cases, they have to arrive as though they intend to see the children even after the other parent has stated that they canceled the scheduled parenting time. They may want to communicate in writing regarding a desire for makeup parenting time.
They can then use that documentation to support a request for custody enforcement. The courts can order makeup parenting time for an adult denied time with their children. In cases involving repeated or overt custody order violations, family law judges might even agree to modify the current custody order. When one parent demonstrates an inability to put the children’s needs before their own desires, that can alter what a judge believes might be in the children’s best interest.
Appropriate actions can help protect parents who have not received the parenting time that they deserve based on a joint custody order. Custody enforcement and modification efforts can help parents maintain their close bond with their children.