If this is your first holiday season since your divorce, then you’re likely experiencing many emotions. Sadness and wondering how your children will be impacted may be at the forefront of your mind.
Here are some tips for getting through the holidays and looking forward to a new year.
1 Communicate plans
Both parents want to spend Christmas with their children. Some decide that the best way to do that is to have everyone under one roof, celebrating together, on Christmas Day. If that causes too much turmoil, there are other arrangements. One parent could be with the children on Christmas Eve, and the other could be with them the next day. Or, one parent can have Thanksgiving while the other gets Christmas, then alternating the following year.
2. Create new traditions
A divorce allows you to redefine what the holidays mean for you and your family. Some traditions may feel too painful, while others no longer make sense. This is a time to create new ones. It could be volunteering at a food kitchen as a family, creating a special meal or starting a holiday movie marathon.
Creating new traditions can bring positive energy to the season. They allow you and your children to begin this new chapter of your lives with a sense of control and optimism.
3. Prioritize your children
We don’t want our children to lose their belief in the magic that makes the holidays so special. Christmas should be full of joy, not tears. Avoid unnecessary conflict and badmouthing the other parent.
4. Self-care is crucial
It’s easy to get so involved in the holiday planning and caring for your children that you don’t take the time to take care of yourself. Make time for activities that help you relax and recharge.
You will likely be sad and lonely at times, and that’s okay. Allowing yourself to experience these emotions is healthy and natural. Afterward, focus on the positives in your life. Your children probably also have times of sadness because their parents are no longer together, and it seems like everything is changing. Practicing self-care fills your “cup” so that you can care for your children and meet their emotional needs.
Adjusting to your new post-divorce life will take time. However, you can begin creating new, happy memories for you and your children this Christmas.